Ok, I’ve always had moderate requests from Santa or my family when it comes to gifts.
But this year, I’ve got a big request for something small. No, I don’t want a tiny Pinzgauer 4wd drive vehicle or another Chihuahua
Here’s the deal, Santa, and family. I’ve got a really big one-acre front lawn that’s not quite complete, despite the ever increasing number of fruit trees down there. I think it looks a little naked and needs something to round out the image of Farmer Jim.
What I’d really like, Santa, is a miniature highland heifer. You know the hairy cows with the downward sloping horns?
I mean dudes, I’ve been a good boy, and I have a huge birthday in a few weeks, and if you combine my birthday and Christmas gifts and give me just one breedable miniature highland heifer, I’d be really happy.
And, if you do this, I promise, no sniping gophers with my pellet rifle, or using fuel air explosives to kill the little bastards in their runs for at least 60 days.
And Santa, if you don’t come across with my tiny cow, we’re going to have a frank discussion. Also, I know where you live.
Santa and family, for the first time in my adult life, I know zackly what I want for my birthday and Christmas. There’s nothing ambiguous in my request and to help you make my wish come true I’ve attached a picture of what I want—a miniature highland heifer---Jim Forbes—on 11/10, 2008.